“Online dating? Me? Hell no. There are too many pervs and creepers in the world who can most likely be found all over those sketchy OkCupid and eHarmony websites. Besides, I don’t need a website to help me find a date. I go to school, work, and have a social life. Those are much better ways to meet guys than an online dating site.”
I had been telling myself this for a long time, but within the last year, I started to realize that my lifestyle is not at all conducive for meeting straight guys. For one, I majored in English while in college. If there was a pie chart to show the different kinds of people who pursue this major, it would say: 70% Socially Awkward Girls, 25% Socially Awkward Guys, and 5% Fun, Outgoing, Normal People. I also minored in Dance, which is: 95% Girls and 5% Gay Guys. As far as my job goes, I work in a girly café where the employees are made up of chicks, gay guys, or guys who are in very committed relationships. And finally, there’s my social life: My extracurricular activities include swing dancing and yoga. Need I say more? I do like to go out to bars and social drink with my friends, but I’ve been doing the meeting guys at bars thing for a while now, and I’m kind of over it.
I finally gave into the notion of online dating a week ago when a good friend of mine started telling me about how she had just joined OkCupid and proceeded to show me pictures of all the cute guys she was meeting through the site. “Whoa, whoa, wait a minute,” I thought out loud. “These are the kinds of guys who are on dating websites? Where do I sign up?”
My friend had sold me on the idea. Plus, I figured since I’ve been making friends through Twitter and my blog lately, meeting a guy online couldn’t hurt. And sure, I’m getting ready to most likely move out of the country in three weeks, but my joining the site would just be a fun way to pass the time until my departure: I could meet some cute guys, go on some dates, have a few flings and call it a day. Besides, it’s just a free dating website. How could I possibly take it seriously, and how could anything serious come from it?
So last Wednesday, I joined OkCupid, and pretty soon, the messages and “winks” started filling up my inbox. There were definitely some pervs and creepers. There were some guys who weren’t very cute and seemed unsure of themselves. There were some guys who wrote like this: “Hey gurl, wut up? How yoo doin? Yoo lookin 4 uh man?” There were some guys who needed to learn the meaning of brevity when it came to writing self-summaries for their novel-length profiles. And there were actually some good-looking guys who seemed kinda cool, but not enough to the make me actually want to meet them in person.
But then the following Friday, I found Chance**. Or more like I found his profile after it showed up under the “Top Matches” section of my home page. His avatar caught my interest because it wasn’t the typical, self-portrait-I-took-in-a-bathroom-with-my-camera-phone shot, so I decided to see what the rest of his profile was all about. After checking out his photos and instantly becoming attracted to his looks, I read through his “About Me” section to find out that Chance is funny, smart, adventurous, goal-oriented, and a complete people-person: also all things I look for in a guy. In fact, his profile was so inviting, I decided to actually make the first move for once and message him.
The rest of the day was spent messaging back and forth with Chance through OkCupid; Saturday was spent emailing; and Sunday, as well as every day since then, has been spent sending texts, pictures, and videos to each other. It’s been really great getting to know Chance so well before our date this Friday, but it’s also been kind of weird for me: I’m not used to meeting people online first before I meet them in real life. Also, I know what he looks like and have heard his voice, so it feels like we’ve already met in a way. And finally, I’ve been feeling a connection between the two of us: we have a lot in common, we have a similar sense of humor, and we can “talk” all day about absolutely nothing at all. I feel like whatever it is that’s happening between me and Chance is the last thing I ever expected to find on a free online dating site.
I know I sound like I’m getting way ahead of myself; I mean, I’ve only known the guy for five days and haven’t even met him in real life yet. However, I just can’t help but realize that I haven’t had this kind of connection with a guy in a really long time: Chance sends me texts that consist of song lyrics from the ‘80s since we both love that genre of music; he emails me his embarrassing childhood photos and laughs when I tease him about them; and you know what’s really cute? He sends me little video clips from his phone to show me what he’s doing throughout his day. Having these kinds of interactions with a guy is relatively new for me, but you know what? It’s kind of awesome, even if it’s with a guy whom I’ve never met before.
Like I mentioned earlier, Chance and I have a date this Friday night, which I’m pretty excited about because I’ll finally get to meet this guy in real life. But I’m also nervous because there are two possibilities that could happen during our date:
1) We meet each other in person and discover that we have even more chemistry in person than online/via cell phone.
2) We meet in person and I discover that his real life presence isn’t as great as it is online/via cell phone, or vice versa.
Due to the fact that I’m most likely leaving in three weeks, possibility #2 is almost preferable, because if we end up hitting it off on Friday night, my life is about to get extremely complicated in the Dating Department at a really bad time.