Well, here I am: 40 weeks pregnant and no signs of labor in sight. I had my 40 week check up on Tuesday and when my midwife checked my cervix, she said the baby’s head was lower but I’m still not even a centimeter dialated yet! This was discouraging news to hear. I also haven’t been having any real contractions yet, just irregular cramping once in a while, and my midwife said I need contractions in order to dialate. I’ve been trying to get more walking in these last couple days to help naturally induce labor, but it’s hard to walk a lot when it just triggers lower back and pelvic pain.
Friends and family keep asking how I’m feeling. Honestly, I’m miserable in more ways than one:
Physically, everything hurts. I have lower back and pelvic pain. My hands and feet are swollen. I have carpal tunnel in my hands. My midwife confirmed I have PUPPS since my body itches all over. I feel huge and I want my body back. I feel helpless and handicapped.
Mentally, I’m stressing out. I was hoping baby would be a week early, or even just a few days early so I could have a little more than 8 weeks with him before I have to go back to work. But now that he’s late, I’m losing time with him. This is especially stressful because I really want to be able to breastfeed, but I will most likely need 3-4 weeks to establish breastfeeding and then more time after that to introduce a bottle with breastmilk so his caregivers can feed him when I’m not there. I would also like to be fully recovered from labor by the time I go back to work; I’ll need 6 weeks to do so, 8 if I end up having a c-section.
Emotionally, I just want my baby already. Everyone I know who was pregnant this year has had their baby already so I feel like the last one who is just waiting around to go into labor. I was a little jealous seeing pictures on social media of all the new moms with their babies on Christmas. I was hoping my baby would be here for Christmas, too!
I gotta say, these last couple weeks of pregnancy have been the worst. Not only am I beyond uncomfortable, but I’m starting to get bored with all this waiting around. I’ve watched tons of movies, read pregnancy books (which I’m sick of BTW), and cleaned/organized just about everything in the house. I even bought a 1500 piece puzzle to keep me busy while I wait to go into labor. Funny how I prepared everything for baby early in my third trimester because I thought there was a chance he’d come early. Now I’m overdue with nothing to do.
There are still a couple days left of 2016 for Baby M to make his appearance, but I’m not going to hold my breath. I’ve accepted the fact that he could end up being a January baby, and there’s nothing I can do about it.